CO129-425 - Governor Sir May - 1915 [10-12] — Page 692

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683

I would find some good pretext for the failure of the enterprise.

I

I did not yet know what pretext, but I was sure to find one.

would, however, keep the "comité" on the string for some 6 or 6

months, so that I should have some £5,000 to 3,500 for my own pur-

pose's. More than half of it I would send to my family. With the

rest I could make a living for years in Singapore whereas I would

save a little by my literary contributions to the Javanese papers

and an very sober in my own wants. I realized very well that this

was breach of faith and common theft, but I did not feel any sting

of conscience yet. I stare at these words now: breach of faith,

theft. And I shiver for them. But then at that time in Holland

I congratulated myself. Though I had not so much money, as I had

1 imagined in my Dreams of Hatred, I had a start, I could begin. thought already about means to force the "comité" to send more

to work for them. For them money, when I was gone and supposed

Had the "comité" known, that the greater part of the money,

which was handed to me for the voyage was sent by me to my wife directly from Holland, they would have understood that I was already betraying them then and there. But of course t'ey did not know.

The

I started for Bew York in the first days of September.

Boy bad come to Rolland with a packet containing, as he said, my

I had instructions, plans, a map, and letters of introduction.

I

I remember

to open these things at sea or in America and act to circumstances.

Two or three nights I never glanced at the contents of the packet. before we reached New York I fastened a bunch of heavy JODOWB,

found on deck, to theparcel and threw it overboard. quite well that even at this hard, concrete fact of treachery

against them who trusted me, I did not feel any repentance.

I think